Dear Dad,

Tomorrow is Father’s Day.  You have now been a father for over 50 years.  I know now that this is no small task.  As a mother for over 18 years, I am beginning to realize the magnitude of the commitment you have made.  Not just to me and my siblings, but to the generations after us.

My mind races over the years and the memories, as if they were yesterday.  Tickling your feet and running away before you could get up!  Being held by you during church and taken out when I was more than a little noisy.  Eating pizza on Friday nights with the Dukes of Hazzard.  Trips to Northern Michigan in the back of our pickup truck in the days before seatbelts were required.  The lone hunting trip where I am sure I drove you crazy and you were happy to drop me back off at Grandma’s house. Coming home late from curfew and praying you were not awake (you always were). Walking down the aisle with you on my wedding day (not sure who was more nervous) after waiting so many years.  On and on, the memories flood my heart and mind as I realize how you were always there, usually very silent, but still…you were there.

That is your style, quiet (unless you’ve been listening to Rush Limbaugh) and watching.  I remember the softball games.  You probably didn’t realize how much difference it made that you were there to watch.  I, so desperately, wanted to please you then.  And it always seemed as though I would falter while you watched. But still you were there.

Every time my car broke down or made a “noise”, I would reach for my phone to hear your voice.  Somehow, having you know about my problem made me feel very safe.  Even during those years when I was so far away from home, just hearing your voice made everything better.  It meant I was not alone.

I remember one special weekend as I left your “new” place in the north to return to my home in the south of Michigan.  That was the beginning of the age of tears for you.  When I saw God soften you, change you forever… I watched my strong father weep as he said good-bye to his child.  In that moment, I began to realize the power our children have over our hearts.  For good or bad, our hearts are forever entwined in theirs.  I had never felt more loved than I did on that day.

Even during the painful and foolish years, you watched, wept, and waited.  Sometimes I wish you would have spoken.  Perhaps you didn’t know quite know what to say.  Perhaps it was that girls were scary. They are scary to me, too.  Maybe I would have listened, maybe not. Nevertheless, you were still there to help me pick up the broken pieces in your own quiet, strong-and now softer-way.

The cry of the heart of a girl is to know that she is worthy to be loved and that she will be safe.   Dad, all those days when I needed you, you were there.  I didn’t always appreciate it (especially when I was sneaking in late), but today, I realize the power of the commitment you have made to me and all of our family.   During the difficult times, you chose to stay and be our dad.  You chose to stay and be our mom’s husband, for better, for worse, in sickness, and in health, as long as you both have lived, you have been here.

As I watch you age, I am coming to the reality that this will not and cannot last forever.  So, I thank God each day that you are still here.

You are now enjoying your time as the central hub of our family.  You are reaping the benefits of a life well-invested as you enjoy the hugs, love, and admiration of each of your grandchildren.  As you enjoy their regular phone calls, I hope your heart rejoices in those special moments.  I find it a privilege that my children get more texts from their “Papa” than from any of their friends.  So still you are here-making sure all of us are loved-and yes, still safe.

In this day of absent fathers, you have shown great character and fortitude as a man.  I know you love those old western movies you watch every day.  As you watch John Wayne, Chuck Norris, and all the rest of the tough guys who star as heroes slinging their guns and riding horses off into the sunset, maybe you miss the days of strength and youthfulness.  But Dad…you need to know that YOU are the hero of our story.  The story of your children and your grandchildren because you never rode off.  You chose to stay.  You chose every day through the good times and bad to be the one who would answer the cry of this little, red-haired girl, her siblings, and their children-a cry to be loved and to be safe under the watchful eye of a loving Dad.

So this Father’s Day, I say a special thank you.  Thank you for loving us each and every day.  Thank you for watching over us and whispering your quiet prayers to God alone for each one of us.  Thank you for waiting on us during our foolish moments.  And, mostly, thank you for showing us what it means to be a man of faith who trusts God to carry him during the difficult times in life with perseverance to the very end.  May we all rise to that example you chose to set.

We are so glad you were here.